tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post8045427600075994252..comments2023-06-06T07:38:35.538-06:00Comments on Answering the What If: First blogfest entry!Angie Paxtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16858564760009040975noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-92221633494299440992010-05-12T09:42:47.482-06:002010-05-12T09:42:47.482-06:00WooHoo! I LOVED this! Really loved it. Well done, ...WooHoo! I LOVED this! Really loved it. Well done, Angie.Lola Sharphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14394765053485642935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-46488180988649957152010-05-07T09:17:57.398-06:002010-05-07T09:17:57.398-06:00Thank you everyone for all the great feedback and ...Thank you everyone for all the great feedback and compliments. It's amazing what a little positive feedback can do. You've given me a new lease on my WIP. Thanks so much! Oh and Sophia, 'merely' is outta there. Thanks again.Angie Paxtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16858564760009040975noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-45875182600960367142010-05-06T06:02:52.597-06:002010-05-06T06:02:52.597-06:00well done!
but typical woman, thinks she can '...well done!<br /><br />but typical woman, thinks she can 'fix' him ;) lollaughingwolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08873675614347328116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-1410971159509741772010-05-06T02:52:04.645-06:002010-05-06T02:52:04.645-06:00Oh Angie!!
This was a really vivid and terrifying...Oh Angie!!<br /><br />This was a really vivid and terrifying piece of a woman on the edge and nearly over it!<br /><br />I do like how she thought David was a golem - the way he unfurled before her stupor and drugged vision - brilliant!<br /><br />I'd really want to know more about the dynamics of the David and Ruth relationship to feel for David - I think it's because this poor woman nearly obliterates herself for this man who then returns to her. Very, very intriguing!<br /><br />Thanks for sharing!<br /><br />Take care<br />xOld Kittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13185547869183611159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-50042456395410283692010-05-06T00:19:51.382-06:002010-05-06T00:19:51.382-06:00Very, very good job. Quite intense, riveting actua...Very, very good job. Quite intense, riveting actually.<br /><br />And as soon as the strength hits Ruth's legs, she should go very far, very fast.<br /><br />David is a very sick man. I got the impression that Ruth's a pychic. If so, then she should see nothing but darkness can come from staying with an insane man. Brrrr.<br />RolandRoland D. Yeomanshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00338410857990551352noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-83716062337563304992010-05-05T19:42:02.685-06:002010-05-05T19:42:02.685-06:00Fabulous. Beautifully paced and very powerful. I w...Fabulous. Beautifully paced and very powerful. I wanted to scream for her to get out of there, but she clearly loves David, and love sometimes makes us stupid.VR Barkowskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04927993233682731113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-90718988568111477532010-05-05T18:27:31.767-06:002010-05-05T18:27:31.767-06:00Vivid and intense, this was a great entry for the ...Vivid and intense, this was a great entry for the blogfest. :)sarahjayne smythehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02589820347348973092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-68090676212549343382010-05-05T17:41:50.255-06:002010-05-05T17:41:50.255-06:00How very brave of you to put your work out there a...How very brave of you to put your work out there and enter the blogfest - great job!Jaydee Morganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01069805915071090479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-71468388600695034162010-05-05T16:38:18.952-06:002010-05-05T16:38:18.952-06:00WOW! is all I can say. Well done!WOW! is all I can say. Well done!Julie Musilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02150454913885915017noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-90862437668446254522010-05-05T15:33:25.641-06:002010-05-05T15:33:25.641-06:00WOW! You hooked me with this. *shivers* :-)WOW! You hooked me with this. *shivers* :-)Shannon O'Donnellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17299313309059235876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-32219444754284788432010-05-05T15:18:58.870-06:002010-05-05T15:18:58.870-06:00Whoa! Super creepy and intense and utterly absorbi...Whoa! Super creepy and intense and utterly absorbing. I was engaged from beginning to end. You did such a great job with the POV, letting us see through her drug-addled eyes as she's coming out of the haze. Well done.Carolina M. Valdez Schneiderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11589934533051907801noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-5565108029296596822010-05-05T15:15:18.443-06:002010-05-05T15:15:18.443-06:00I second (seventh?) the feeling that this is a ver...I second (seventh?) the feeling that this is a very vivid and intense scene, well-written and a definite hook. I'm clamouring for more!<br /><br />My only critique would be to drop the 'merely' before sleep in the second line. I stumbled over the word and it jerked me out of the flow. I feel it would be a much tighter sentence without the adverb since the 'merely' part becomes clear through the next sentence. Just my two cents.<br />- Sophia.Sophiahttp://myfleet-footedself.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-77566569905291377302010-05-05T13:20:03.640-06:002010-05-05T13:20:03.640-06:00His eyes snagged on mine, some unreadable emotion ...His eyes snagged on mine, some unreadable emotion eeling about in their black, frightening depths. <br /><br />You describe things so vividly, the similes so powerful that I literally leaned away from the words. Wow. Thank you so much for participating!<br /><br />I hope to read more...preferably from a book I bought. =)Raquel Byrneshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12870113745683162915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-90668916523818762252010-05-05T12:41:00.424-06:002010-05-05T12:41:00.424-06:00Wowee! For a first ever blogfest entry, you done ...Wowee! For a first ever blogfest entry, you done pretty darn good! <br /><br />Great job Angie, nice flow, continuity, scary as all get out. Makes me definately want to know what David's problem is.Anne Gallagherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05816355522284492131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-8458990298488601812010-05-05T12:40:02.891-06:002010-05-05T12:40:02.891-06:00Really creepy! I have to agree with Catherine, I&#...Really creepy! I have to agree with Catherine, I'd want to be out of there too!mary.anne.gruen@gmail.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16839396134411360643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-84490249025801283062010-05-05T12:35:42.289-06:002010-05-05T12:35:42.289-06:00This was sooooo good. Only if I were her I'd b...This was sooooo good. Only if I were her I'd be out of that house and as far as I could get thinking he was crazy or possessed. Of course, then there wouldn't be a story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-86783598490702604432010-05-05T12:10:55.214-06:002010-05-05T12:10:55.214-06:00Definitely very intense. You have a gift for drawi...Definitely very intense. You have a gift for drawing your reader in. I don't really have anything negative to say. I haven't read the rest of the novel, of course, but I like how you can't tell who or what David is. It's really suspenseful and I love how you can feel what your character does and see what she sees.KAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01492662417610004495noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9107245040090735659.post-29901461595509297012010-05-05T11:49:02.888-06:002010-05-05T11:49:02.888-06:00This was great Angie! Very intense! I love the end...This was great Angie! Very intense! I love the ending it was really sweet!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03667521490706435608noreply@blogger.com