Monday, February 4, 2013

Cupid's Kissing Scene Competition!

Cupid is having a kissing scene competition and I'm part of it. After you get done reading my stuff, pop on over and check out the other entrants.  They're great and a great way to get you in the mood for Valentine's Day. 

This kissing scene is from my manuscript Seeds which is a retelling of the Persephone/Demeter myth.  In this scene Hades and Persephone have been bathing together in a natural hot springs in his palace in the Underworld.  This is what happens on the way back to the bedchamber.   (Sidenote: Persephone's name means 'destroyer of light' in Greek.)

Hades mouth left hers. Persephone opened her eyes as he moved to her side and crouched. One hand went around her back, the other behind her knees. He lifted her in a sucking splash of water and carried her from the pool and then from the bathing room.

As he stepped into the hall, his feet slid on the plaster. Persephone could tell by the squeak of wet skin, by the flex of the muscles in his midsection which pressed against her side that he was struggling to maintain his balance. She too tensed in anticipation of the fall. He went down, grunting as he landed hard on his buttocks, Persephone splayed across his legs.

“Are you well? You aren’t hurt?” He gasped, his voice revealing that he was.

Persephone struggled to hold back the laugh she could feel building in her throat. “I am well.”

She struggled for gravity in her voice, but she, like Hades’s before her when trying to maintain his balance, struggled in vain. She raised her eyes to Hades’s face, took in its pained expression and began to laugh; great gulping whoops of merriment that left her weak and helpless leaning against Hades’s chest.

His arms went around her and after a moment she felt his stomach begin to shake with laughter where it pressed against her arm.

When the muscles in her abdomen could bear no more, her laughter trailed off into a few scattered, gleeful chortles. Still chuckling, she rolled away from Hades to get to her feet.

 As she came to her knees, Hades pulled her to him and looked into her face, his thumbs pushing the wet hair back from her cheeks. “You are my light and my life, Persephone.”

His light, she thought. Her eyes filled with quick tears. Not wanting him to mistake them for tears of sadness, she hid them from him by pressing a kiss to his lips then clambering to her feet. Once she was upright and her emotions in check, she extended a hand and helped Hades to his feet. They walked handclasped to her chambers.




Old Kitty said...

Awwwwww!! How romantic! And I too laughed (much quicker than Persephone!)when mighty muscly Hades fell! LOL!!

Well done you!! Take care

Amber said...

It would take bathwater to make Hades fall on his butt.

I thought this scene was really great. It had a nice mixture of emotions and actions which I appreciated. I particularly liked the detail "the flex of the muscles in his midsection which pressed against her side that he was struggling to maintain his balance."

I've always been interested in the Hades/Persephone myth so this is right up my alley.

Good luck in the kissing competition and thanks for sharing this delightful kiss!

-Amber (#41)
My Kissing Scene

Larissa said...

Hee! This is a fun kiss scene! Loved it!

Larissa (#47)

Mandy P.S. said...

I love Greek mythology, and I loved this scene. I particularly loved the way you ended it, with them walking to her room, holding hands. It's such a simple thing, but it means so much.

The description was great. I could completely see what was happening. Good job! And good luck!

~Mandy (#28)

Kate Larkindale said...

This was fun! I've never thought of Hades being charming or sexy or goofy before....

Melonie said...

I am a sucker for a myth re-telling and I love how you show us a softer, sillier (and clumsier) side of the big bad boy of the Underworld. Nice work with this! I'd read more :)

Melonie (kiss #29)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for mentioning the meaning of Persephone's name in the beginning because the last paragraph was so meaningful and I would have missed it (not knowing much about Greek mythology). I thought the last paragraph was so sweet and romantic :)

Jessica #42

Virginia Pierce said...

This is well crafted and beautiful. I myself am not really a mythology girl, so that helped me too, so thanks for helping us get more meaning out of it :) Good luck and btw, your blog is nice and crisp. Love it!

Virginia #7

Shannon Wixom said...

I really liked the line: ...great gulping whoops of merriment that left her weak and helpless leaning against Hades’s chest.

This is a cute scene, but I was pulled out of it when you used the word "struggled" three times right in a row. In the first case, I don't think you need that word at all. You get the same effect if you just say: Persephone held back the laugh she could feel building in her throat. Then I would omit another "struggled" so it is used only one time.

-Entry #12

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Deirdra said...

Hi I'm looking for your contact info for a book review/post?
Can you email me at EdenLiterary at gmail dot com